If somebody asks you, “Have you ever been in a relationship? How strong was it?”—what would your answer be? Yeah, obviously, if it’s a girl asking, you might try to gain sympathy by saying she dumped you, and not the other way around—unless you’re being honest with yourself. But even if it’s a general question, you’ll most likely answer by stating “the number of months” you were together.
But why only the duration? Why do we measure relationships in months or years when describing them to others? Why not talk about the real things—like, “Were you happy?” or “Did you truly love her?”
LET’S THINK ABOUT IT…
To understand a person, you need to know them for some time—and that “some time” depends on how comfortable you are with them. For some, it can be days or months. For others, it may take a year or more. What you’re doing in that time is building a bond, and that bond grows stronger with every interaction between two souls. Every emotion you feel carries meaning, and it reflects in the relationship you share.
What comes next is trust—the trust you have in the person you love. It’s easy to trust someone at first, but what happens later? What if that person breaks your trust by cheating or for some trivial reason? What is the value of your trust then? What drives a person to trust—and then to break it? The answer isn’t complicated: You.
Trust is an emotional construct in a relationship. If she trusts you, she allows vulnerability—something that can either be cherished or exploited. It’s a sense of togetherness that you’ve always longed to feel. But everything in life has its pros and cons. It’s up to you whether you want to invest yourself in something that carries the risk of breaking—like a person. If you truly want to love someone, you must accept their flaws. That’s the only way to prove you’re worthy of their trust.
Now comes the difficult part—conflict between lovers. Some choose to talk it out, while others walk away, leaving behind a mess. No matter how strong a relationship is, if you give up after a single blow, you’re not ready to claim you were truly in one. If you can enjoy the happy moments, why not face the conflicts and understand their deeper meaning? Fights can strengthen a bond. They create opportunities to grow, to understand each other better, and to become more comfortable with one another. They give you time to reflect on your mistakes and improve. Isn’t it meaningful to think not just about the other person, but also about yourself? Let it sink in—and if both of you are willing to grow, love only deepens. Sometimes, it’s as simple as a sincere apology and a kiss on the forehead. 😉
That’s how it should be. When you reach that point, you don’t have to worry about things becoming unnecessarily complicated. In the end, what truly matters is your presence in each other’s lives—and that alone is enough to build a strong, stable relationship.
One last question: Should we really measure love in days and months just to define its intensity?
The answer is simple: if you truly know the person, and you believe she’s the one, then you already know the answer.
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