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LESS OF ME. MORE OF HER.

It’s very common that you go out with your girlfriend and just can’t get over her pretty face. You keep staring at her like a puppy, and whenever she says something, you simply nod your head without saying anything. At that point, it feels like you’re done expressing yourself through words, and the only way to say yes or no is by nodding or making gestures. This is what it’s like to forget yourself and live for someone you love. You just can’t get over your emotions, and everything starts to blur out. Have you ever considered expressing how much she means to you? Girls always like it when you open up and say such things. They tend to be more sensitive when it comes to feeling emotions. They may not tell you everything they feel, but they will always drop hints about what they’re going through at that moment. Now don’t ask me what those hints are or how they do it—it’s your job to figure that out. Simply observing her won’t give you all the answers. Instead, listen to her, understand he...
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FIRST LOVE. LAST LOVE.

How often do you think that the love you felt first is the only one that lasts forever? What makes your first love stronger than the rest? Why do we keep replaying those moments again and again in our minds? And if you were once happy with her, why did things change?

Let’s go back to a time when everything was simpler. A time when things carried promises, even if they were fragile. A time when we listened to our hearts instead of believing someone else’s hurtful words. Looks didn’t matter back then—only the person did. You felt happier with her rather than being full of worries. One end of the string was tied to your heart, and the other to your lover’s. You could almost feel both hearts beating together, in perfect sync.

That sensation—the one that pulls together memories hidden in the corners of your mind—is something you wish to feel even after years have passed, even when that person is no longer around or in touch. But now everything feels unclear. Everything feels like an illusion. Promises seem like mere words with no shelter, no emotion attached to them. What you’re really doing is denying the truth—that things change, and so does love. There’s no way to feel the same love again, because your heart has changed over time, and someone else may come along to reshape it. Even if someone once hurt you, you still believe your first love remains untouched, irreplaceable. But isn’t it a bit unfair to your own heart to hold on so tightly that it never gets a chance to move on?

Five years have passed, and I’m still stuck on her. I still remember the softness of her hand in mine. Some things just don’t have substitutes. I feel helpless, yet I somehow find comfort in this brokenness. After all this time, my love for her hasn’t changed. But if I’m still this happy holding onto her memory, then why isn’t she here with me now? Maybe… she just doesn’t feel the same.

And that’s exactly why love like this rarely gets the chance to grow. One-sided love doesn’t find a place to settle. There’s no home for it—it just keeps wandering, holding on to the hope that someday, someone will offer it a place to belong. A place where feelings can connect, and where you can finally move forward from yesterday.

Comments

  1. Writing memoriesSeptember 26, 2020 at 2:20 AM

    I sense a healing from these broken words , i felt optimism flowing towards me while i read it . It was heartbreaking but insightful . The way every paragraph ends , i long to read more of it .

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